Subj: comments on premise for Ep. 96
Date: Friday, September 10, 2004 1:05:45 PM
From: Peter Laird
To: Lloyd Goldfine
Lloyd,
Here are my comments on the Ep. 96 premise.
1.) Re: the following:
"Taking extra precautions by using a large dumpster that Donny has rigged for mobility, the turtles enter April’s place from the back … bringing some of the dumpster stink with them."
I am wondering what "rigged for mobility" means. Are we saying here that the Turtles are inside the Dumpster and are driving it to April's shop? THAT surely won't attract the attention of anyone who might be watching the shop! And once they arrive in the Dumpster, don't they have to get out of it? Won't they be seen then? I think we need to find another way to get the Turtles to and from the shop -- maybe there is a way underground, perhaps a hidden tunnel that they have dug. Or maybe they hide in plain sight -- coming in through the front door in some roughly human disguises/outfits.
And the "dumpster stink" gag is lame.
2.) Re: the following:
"As they are about to activate the artifact, April remembers the compass! She grabs it and they SWOOOSHHH through dimensions!"
It's good that April remembers "the" compass, but how does she (and we) know what compass Augie is referring to in his "email from beyond" message? His "...compass..." message seems pretty generic on the surface of it.
3.) Re: the following:
"And, now that Donatello and April are here with the compass, all that will be possible. It’ll be a cinch to pinpoint earth’s dimension and travel there unhindered."
I'm starting to lose it here. How can this incredibly sophisticated and powerful super computer be capable of sending email to Earth across the dimensions, yet can't locate Earth without the aid of a... compass??!!?? This is getting really silly.
And doesn't it seem like there should be some more reaction from April and Augie when they are reunited, and also some kind of reaction from Augie when he meets Don for the first time? It all seems so blase.
4.) Re: the following:
"Matters only get worse when one of the dwarves takes the compass from Augie.
Our heroes catch up with this dwarf in the big computer room. He’s asked the computer to scan the compass.
NOTE: This will allow us to bring these dwarves back in the future as the mega computer could be able to help them recreate the device (artifact) and the compass (and the location of dimension earth) and thus travel to our world.
But, just as our heroes are about to be surrounded by thousands of angry dwarves, Augie, Donatello and April manage to use the artifact and the compass to SHOOOSH out of there!"
And it gets even sillier! How is scanning the COMPASS supposed to allow the computer to recreate the artifact? Makes no sense. Also, why don't the "warrior dwarves" just take the compass from April and Don by overwhelming force when they show up? Why all of this time-wasting "Let's party" nonsense? Unless these dwarf characters get a LOT more interesting as this episode develops, I for one don't want to seem them again.
5.) Re: the following:
"Arriving back at April’s apartment … where Robyn, who’s just waking up, sees them arrive … and sees Uncle Augie and a four foot tall green mutant ninja turtle! She faints!
When she’s revived, she sees only April and Uncle Augie, who’s just back from “...living in the jungles of Borneo … ahem, ahem.” Both assure Robyn that she was dreaming about the big, green turtle, who just so happens to be clandestinely peeking in through the window with a big, turtley grin. And, we fade away …"
The fainting gag worked for when April first met the Turtles -- she was really stressed out and exhausted by running from all the mousers that had chased her and tried to kill her, and she had just met THREE of these Turtles and they TALKED to her -- but here it is just silly and pointless.
6.) One idea that just came to me which might make this weak story a little more interesting (to me at least) and add a fun twist to it: The dwarves are planning to invade/conquer/plunder Earth (actually, if they have the Artifact -- not this stupid compass -- and get the computer to figure out how to use it, couldn't they plunder ANY dimension, no just ours?), and give the artifact to the super computer to scan and analyze. But... what they (and we) don't understand up to that point is that it's the super computer which is calling the shots -- IT wanted to get its "hands" on the Artifact, because what it wants to do is get rid of these annoying invaders (the dwarves) who are cluttering up its beautiful city and disturbing it from what it wants to do (ponder the mysteries of the universe). And once it possesses and understands how to use the Artifact, it uses the Artifact's power to zap all of those annoying dwarves... somewhere. (Maybe to another dimension, maybe to the bottom of an ocean, maybe out into deep space... we'll leave it to the imagination.) Then it sends April, Don and Augie home.
-- Pete
No comments:
Post a Comment