Blast from the Past #537: February 13, 2007: Re: TMNT144 Master Fighter 2105 Outline, February 14, 2007: Re: TMNT145 Outline, February 15, 2007: Re: Revised Outline TMNT144 and Re: FW: TMNT146 Outline

Subj: Re: TMNT144 Master Fighter 2105 Outline
Date: Tuesday, February 13, 2007 11:16:05 PM
From: Peter Laird
To:   Lloyd Goldfine


comments on Ep. 144 outline


This one kind of made my brain hurt. But here goes...


1.) Although I think the idea that Mike is a huge fan of this "Master FIghter" character is a fine idea, I wonder if -- given Mike's personality -- there should be something MORE to the whole "Master Fighter" thing than just sparring and training. Maybe Master Fighter also likes to do something FUN -- gorge himself on certain kinds of foods, play crazy practical jokes, make up goofy rhymes, or something like that... something that Mikey would really get into.


2.) Re: the following:

"New Mahattan's Power Coupling! Viral spies on the very small, but very important piece of technology. This glowing box amplifies even the smallest current of electricity to extraordinary levels. It's how the world overcame its energy problems and how Viral plans to cause the world a whole new set of problems.


With the Power Coupling, Viral will be able to augment her powers so she can infect not only computer systems, but human beings as well."

Hrmmm... this is getting a little dodgy. First, the notion that a little glowing box which can somehow "amplify even the smallest current of electricity to extraordinary levels" solved Earth's energy problems seems pretty silly to me.
Second -- and I say this before reading the rest of this outline -- the idea that Viral, by juicing herself up with more power, can now infect human beings (!) seems kind of lazy to me. In other words, rather than figuring out a new way for Viral to use her powers to attack our heroes, the writer chooses to just give her a whole new set of powers (with, as far as I'm concerned, no good reason).


3.) Re: the following:

"Master Fighter delivers a powerful kick, knocking Mikey to the ground. Suddenly, his hand begins to glow red- it's the Fatal Fist of Fury! Mikey shuts  his eyes, preparing for the inevitable. "

Why does Mike just lie there? Seems silly.


4.) Re: the following:

"And with that, he leaves the Dojo! Donatello is shocked, "Uh, he’s not supposed to be able to do that." But, wasting no time for an explanation, Master Fighter crashes through the window and the Turtles watch in shock as he performs a series of amazing flips and spins from flagpoles and antennas, landing safely dozens of stories below."

From this point on, I couldn't make much sense out of the story. It just gets sillier and sillier. I don't get the nature of the connection between Viral and Master Fighter. Is Viral controlling Master Fighter? Is she, in fact, BEING Master FIghter? If so, why does Master FIghter go outside the building and go to find the Relic/Power Coupling to bring back to Viral? Why doesn't Viral just go to the power coupling? There's a lot of stuff here that seems to make no sense.
And the bit that I commented on in comment #1 -- Viral being able to take over human beings -- doesn't seem to even come into play in this story! So I don't get the point of even mentioning this new ability.
I think there is a good story in here somewhere, but right now it just seems like a mishmash of illogical set pieces with little or no coherence.


-- Pete

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Subj: Re:   TMNT145 Outline
Date: Wednesday, February 14, 2007 2:32:50 PM
From: Peter Laird
To:   Lloyd Goldfine

notes on Ep. 145 outline


1.) I had this thought before reading this outline, so maybe it is covered herein, but... has the frozen Utrom Shredder perceived the passage of time as we have? In other words, has be been conscious all of the time he has been frozen, or when he wakes up will he think very little time has passed?


2.) Re: the following:

"Mortu:  “Unfortunately, the political climate on the Utrom Homeworld has changed somewhat.  The threat of the Shredder has been forgotten.  I alone seem destined to keep a watchful eye on the Shredder.”"

I suspect this will be fixed in the script, but I don't think Mortu would refer to the evil Utrom as "the Shredder" so much, but rather by one of the names by which he is more well-known to the Utroms (i.e. Ch'rell... I think that was one of them!).
It just occurred to me that Mortu's dialogue here might actually be a cool place to drop a hint of some as-yet-to-us-unknown looming problem/danger facing the Utroms (and thus Earth and the Turtles, very likely) that MIGHT be worked into a story or two or three if we ever do an eighth season with the Turtles back in their rightful era. The thing is, because THIS episode is set in the future, then anything the Turtles might do to help the Utroms with this threat in the PAST will be to try to forestall the disaster from happening in the first place. I think that makes sense...
In any event, it's just an idea.


3.) Re: the following:

"Leo and his brothers nod and share a look.
Leonardo:  “Definitely not alone.  Whatever you need from us, Captain Mortu, we’re with you.”"

"CAPTAIN Mortu"? Have we ever heard him addressed as "Captain" and not just "Mr."? I can't recall.


4.) Re: the following:

"Of course, trying to get Cody to stay behind is like trying to move Mount Everest with a spoon.  But, it’s too dangerous.  He shouldn’t come.  Cody is insistent!  He really wants to go!  This is an amazing opportunity on so many levels … not least of which is intergalactic space travel!  Hello!  That is so totally wicked cool!"

Minor technical point, but I am pretty sure that the Utroms live in our galaxy, so it would not be "intergalactic" travel.


5.) Re: the following:

" Leatherhead tells of what he’s been doing for the past one-hundred years.  He’s been perfecting a way to transfer his mind into an Utrom … so that he can finally be a part of a “family” and  a “people” … his people are the Utroms and he will finally be one of them.  "

Uhhh... WHAT THE HELL???!!! This is pretty darn weird. So Leatherhead is so full of self-loathing that he is just going to take over some Utrom's body? What's up with THAT?! Unless this is the seed of some clever plot twist further down the road, I think we should ditch this idea ASAP.


6.) Re: the following:

"The Triceraton ship is a mess.  It looks like a huge battle took place … wiring, panels, consoles destroyed.  It was carnage … total carnage … but, where are all the bodies?  Where is everyone?  Not one member of the Triceraton crew is in evidence.  What happened?"

Just thought it might be cool//creepy if the ship has no internal gravity when they board it -- flotsam and jetsam bobbing around in mid-"air" and so forth -- and one of the Turtles reacts when a sharp-pointed thing smacks against his space suit's faceplate... and it turns out to be a broken Triceraton horn!


7.) This could be a lot of fun. I am looking forward to seeing what kind of design you come up with for the "TriShreddaton"!


-- Pete

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Subj: Re:   Revised Outline TMNT144
Date: Thursday, February 15, 2007 9:15:28 PM
From: Peter Laird
To:   Lloyd Goldfine

notes on Ep. 144 revised


1.) Re: the following:

"The Turtles leave the Dojo, and after a brief moment of silence, a surge of energy breaths life back into the android. It retakes the holographic form of Master Fighter. Viral appears on the Dojo’s hex-panels, chastising her new “servant” for failing to defeat the Turtles.


Master Fighter is shocked, believing the spectral image of Viral to be the spirits of his ancestors. Always the Kung Fu warrior, Master Fighter obliviously pledges loyalty to Viral. Viral laughs at this fortuitous turn of events… perhaps she can use this ridiculous program after all. With a servant like Master Fighter, why limit herself to the Turtles, when she could take control of all of New York!"


This struck me as somewhat bizarre at first -- that the virtual Master Fighter would be self-aware in this fashion -- but then it started to seem like a good idea. Something else that occurred to me  was that Viral -- as a "virtual being" herself, might see other virtual beings like Master Fighter in a unique way... perhaps she sees them as "slaves" to the thoughtless "meat beings" who use them for their own amusement and then toss them away or delete their programming. She might then take a protective stance with them.
I'm not sure how Viral goes from using Master FIghter to defeat the Turtles to taking control of all of New York -- that seems like a fairly preposterous leap.


2.) Re: the following:

"<CLANG!> Outside the Virtual Dojo, the Turtles curiously look as something is apparently making a lot of noise inside. <CLANG!> Donatello looks to his computer; apparently no program is running. <CLANG!> And apparently, he’s wrong! <CRASH!> Master Fighter finally breaks through the Virtual Dojo’s metal doors.


Donatello is shocked, "Uh, he’s not supposed to be able to do that." Wasting no time for an explanation, Master Fighter crashes through the window and the Turtles watch in shock as he performs a series of amazing flips and spins from flagpoles and antennas, landing safely dozens of stories below."

I can see how we need Master Fighter to be an actual DROID as opposed to a HOLOGRAM (so he can bust out and do damage in our physical world), but it might be handy to have Don give a reason of his own in the beginning of this tale for why he made MF a droid instead of a hologram. Not sure what that would be.
Actually, I'm a little confused about what Don is referring to here when he says Master Fighter is "not supposed to be able to do that." What, exactly, is he not supposed to be able to do? Operate outside the virtual dojo? If so, why... given that he is a droid and not just a hologram?


3.) Re: the following:

"The Turtles have only one option: Chase down Master Fighter and stop him before he destroys New York. There’s no telling what damage a renegade program like that could cause!"

Is this hyperbole? I just don't see how a kung fu droid like Master Fighter could "destroy New York". Cause trouble, yeah... but DESTROY?


4.) Re: the following:

"Viral: "That's the best part of being a computer program… you simply Cut, Copy and Paste!""

Might this be better as follows?


"Viral: "That's the best part of being a computer program… you simply recompile!"


5.) Just so I'm clear -- at the end of this episode, Master Fighter has somehow been transformed from a physical droid into some kind of program/hologram?


-- Pete

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Subj: Re: FW: TMNT146 Outline
Date: Thursday, February 15, 2007 9:37:21 PM
From: Peter Laird
To:   Lloyd Goldfine

notes on Ep. 146 outline


This could be a fun "caper" episode.


1.) Re: the following:

"ACT THREE


Firing his extendable chucks, MIKEY tags Raph, catching him just as his shell penetrates the field. He lands with a thud, ICE already on his back, “Nice one, Mikey…” But he’s so angry the ice melts right off, “This ain’t funny no more.”"

WAY too "Looney Tunes". Raph's shell heats up and melts ice because he's getting mad? Ugh...


2.) Re: the following:

"The MYSTERIOUS ALIEN “ripples” revealing that it was just a hologram disguising the Turtles! “Gotcha!” The guys smirk as they snap into action, ready to rumble!  


Leo explains with a wink that they set up the whole thing, made easier thanks to Zixx’s HOLO-PROJECTOR! After they realized Bishop wasn’t the Bishop they saw, so they went back to the alley and found the projector in Zixx’s racer… “Which has been impounded, incidentally.” Donny did a little re-programming, and voila!  Instant lesson in greed! “We knew you had to be caught in order to pay back the bounties…and a little guilt doesn’t hurt!”"

It might be fun to take this opportunity to play with both the audience (and maybe Zixx and Zukko as well), and, instead of some weird alien we'v never seen before, have the Turtles' holo-projector project, instead, the image of some known character -- how about Shokanobo? Or Triple Threat? Or the Shredder? Or Nano? Or Garbageman? Or Darius Dunn?


-- Pete